Two Can Never Equal One

Two can never equal one. This is a very basic mathematics rule of thumb. The only way that two can equal one is when you subtract one from it or divide it by itself. Many people question the relevance of mathematics in the modern world where calculators and excel spreadsheets are ‘taking over’ from the human intelligence, making it easier to calculate complex equations. This basic principle can actually be used for one big ‘outer-math’ problem that has two words; split personality.

Although the term ‘split personality’ formally refers to a condition in psychiatry known as a ‘multiple personality disorder’ [a rare disorder in which an individual displays several functionally dissociated personalities, each of a complexity comparable to that of a normal individual*], it is commonly used to describe a person who changes his actions, reactions, and words in different crowds. The words of William Shakespeare explain it nicely, “God has given you one face and you make yourself another.”

Split personality is unbelievably contagious, in fact, if you notice that you have a split personality, then you might realize that your friends have it too. You have just infected the world! Of course, this is not true. I am just pulling your leg.

Now I have good experience with this. Once a beggar came to our front door, and I was sent by my mother to open the door. I opened the door after looking through the peephole and behold, before me stood a bum on the opposite side of the security gate that was dirty, had ragged clothes, and smelled predominantly of alcohol. My first thought was this, ‘Well! This man has money for booze, but not for food, and definitely not for clothing!’ Immediately I was irritated with the fellow and then he asked me for money. I thought again, ‘Well “buddy”, don’t you know when it is enough? You are surely going to use this money for a Castle Lager, or a Heineken! No money for you!’ I firmly shook my head and then he nodded slowly. Then he asked me if I have anything to eat. I frowned as I thought about running into the house to make a sandwich for a drunk. Utterly ridiculous!

I just declined him and closed the door. I had one last thought on the matter, ‘Now I must give our hard-earned food -which my dad breaks his back for every day at work- to a man who is drunk! This is preposterous. He can go work for his food, like the rest of us.’ I went on with my day and gave no further thought to it. Later in the day the doorbell sounded again, and I was called to it once more. I trudged to it and looked through the peephole. I could only deduce that it was a man in a suit. I hastily opened the door. Lo and behold there stood our Pastor with a big smile on his face. He didn’t smell of alcohol, he didn’t have ragged clothes, he was clean, and he was not going to beg. I greeted him friendly and before he had said a word I grabbed a key to open the security gate in order to let him in. I thought about it once more, ‘Man! How privileged we are to have the Pastor visit us!’

Did you notice anything wrong with my behaviour? Is it probable that you can relate to some of that in a way? I have displayed two-facedness successfully, showing a smile to the Pastor because he ‘deserves’ it, and frowning at the beggar because he ‘doesn’t deserve’ my pearly whites. Why did I do so? Isn’t it good to be the same with all people? I did so because I judged the person on the opposite side of the gate way too quickly. If the Pastor and the bum were switched and the bum was the Pastor and the Pastor was the bum, I would -in essence- be extraneously nice to the bum, and cold to the Pastor. This is splitting my personality between two people.

There are reasons -of course- for a split personality, but it comes as a result of the past. We hide our past because it makes us feel shame or anger even. So we smile, or act shy on the outside because we don’t want people to see what lies deeper. And I don’t mean that we must broadcast our past; I mean that we are showing people who we aren’t as a result of our past.

Many people hide who they really are from the outside world not because they plan it. It is just that they don’t want others to see that they are vulnerable, alone, or shy. Some people pretend to be outgoing and boisterous while they are actually calm and solitary. Some people pretend to be holy in public but have dark hearts behind closed doors. Let’s be honest, we all have different sides we show, right? We all have a valid reason for doing so, right? We sometimes don’t even know that we are in error. Some people do it on purpose, but mostly we don’t realise what we are doing.

Have you ever heard or said the following, “I have seen a side of him that I didn’t know,” or something like that? Well, that usually happens when someone you know gets extremely angry, and bursts out, or when your husband brings you tea in the morning for the first time and it’s just made to your satisfaction. One example was bad and the other one was good, but that statement can either be used when someone does something you didn’t know they were capable of [as you just didn’t know the person well enough] or it can mean that the person showed a split personality.

Now, how do you know when you have it? I mean, you can’t be blamed if you don’t know you have it, right? Well, you find out. I must first note one important factor; our behaviour is influenced by what is happening and what we receive from our senses. If we see someone that we don’t like, then our natural reaction is to frown, right? So, apart from the behavioural factor, let me show you how easy it is to distinguish between a normal, and a split personality. It has only two words involved; yes, and no. To who will you be willing to say yes, and to whom will you be willing to say no?

Example; when we sit in front of a movie star and he asks us to make him coffee, will we say no? But, when a beggar asks us for a piece of bread, will we say yes? Now, I am not trying to make anyone feel guilty, but that is how we can successfully distinguish between who we are; the ‘yes and no scenario’. Personally, I would say yes to the movie star -depending on which star it is- and no to the beggar. That is natural, right? No, it is natural to me. You may conclude otherwise to my scenario. My point is that we all are different with different personalities and God made it that way otherwise it would get quite boring if we were all the same.

Now, is it wrong? Well, let’s take a look at a few things. If a man pretends to be someone before his girlfriend, and is not that person [which he is pretending to be] she will end up marrying someone he isn’t -not who he really is. After a while they might end up getting divorced, because then the man stops pretending to be the person that she fell in love with, and then she stops loving him. This effect can work both ways. It is sad, but it is also a reality. So from a marital perspective, it is not very healthy to be that way.

Is it wrong in God’s eyes? Well, think about this next statement; ‘Everything that is opposed to the characteristics of God is sin’. Meaning, for example, that if we do not love other people -like God does- we are sinning, because then we are loveless. It means that if we are not just -like God is- then we are sinning, because then we are unjust and so on.

So, we see that we must do our best to be like God. Although it is impossible to only be good and loving, we should do our best and also help each other, as it is very difficult. Now, what does God say about how a person should be?

The Bible says in Hebrews chapter 13: 8 that, “Jesus Christ [is] the same yesterday, today, and forever.” That is amazing for Jesus, but, what does that have to do with me? Romans 12: 1-2 explains, “Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God -this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is -His good, pleasing, and perfect will.” So, we must be like God is; easier said than done. Though we struggle, we must depend on God to help us; He is the only One that will help us to accomplish this.

What I want to say is this; we mustn’t let our past change who we are to other people. We mustn’t let circumstance change who we are to other people. God made you special. You are the miracle that he made to walk on earth. Let us proclaim who we are by being the same, to the glory of God. As we have seen, being the same can be really beneficial in more ways than one, for us and for others. Remember, you are special, and God loves the person that you really are, regardless of your mistakes.